Was Daddy mad when you got married and didn't change your name?
Nope. He considered changing his, since his last name is so common, but decided to just leave it be.
You could have combined them.
I know, but I don't like the way they sound together. We thought about that when you were born - we thought about giving you my last name, or combining them in some way, but we decided to do what people would expect so that you didn't have to explain it.
I like that my first name comes from Laura's family and my middle name is from your family and my last name is from Daddy's family. Something from everywhere.
Yup.
When I get married, I'm going to change my name. I want to have the same name as my husband.
Well, maybe he'll change his.
Or maybe we'll make up a new one. But I want to feel like part of his family.
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2 comments:
Love it! She is so wise.
I never wanted to change my name to my husband's name until I decided to marry a man with children...I too felt like the name (at least in part) made me feel like part of his family.
I did ask if she feels like I'm less a part of the family because my name is different, and she said "no". I know I would have felt differently if I'd married a man with an identifiably Jewish last name - I don't know if I would have changed it but I would have considered it. Giving up my name for one that is so generic didn't feel like I was joining a family; it felt like I was erasing who I was.
I think for Eve this is also about adoption. We already did change her name, and so changing it again may not feel like quite the loss it would have to me. And she is struggling now to figure out what it means to belong in our family and also in Laura's, so I can understand how that is playing out as she envisions her future.
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